Ron White | Premium Blend | Comedy Central

Ron White didn't climb to the top of the food chain to eat carrots.

Every once in a while you just want to get your dog laid.

Ron shares his new bit about sticking his pecker in a toaster with his family at Thanksgiving.

Ron White even wants to see old biker chicks naked.

If you drink a lot of water, then you're less thirsty.

A pair of sunglasses costs more than a television!

You don't need to be a groupie to get Ron's backstage tour.

Ron talks about marrying Jeff Foxworthy's interior designer.

After missing 7:00 a.m., Ron asked for the next 7:00 wake-up call.

Vegetarians should shut up.

Ron's cousin Ray thinks killing deer with a deer rifle is magic in the forest.

Ron's in-laws are loaded, and they hate his guts.

We're all gay to some extent.

Tater Salad is caught in New York City.

Sluggo loves going to the vet.

Ron White didn't feel the urge to send Robert Tilton $1,000.

Ron White's plane took off from the Albany Airport Hair Care and Tire Center.

Texas is putting in a death penalty express lane.

Ron finds it ironic that the product that protects his sofa from his drink is called "Scotchguard."

If you get a Scottish nationalist cab driver, you can see London in about 10 minutes.

Ron's never read any of Norman Mailer's books, but he's a huge fan.

Ron doesn't go into the bank. He stays in the car with the dogs.

Ron visits a therapist and is given his behavioral diagnosis in this animated bobblehead video.

Ron White talks about the advantage of having only one sex partner in this sneak peek from his new special.

Ron White talks about toilet technology in this sneak peek from his new special.