Between the Breaks - Embarrassing Tractor | Mind of Mencia | Comedy Central

Carlos didn't bust his balls to lose his accent and become a voice for America so that his brother could take his citizenship test in Spanish.

The only time Joseph Mencia's bit on the show made sense was when he made up his lines himself.

Sometimes you get confused when you think in Spanish and talk in English.

You have no idea how much fun it is to light a stuffed animal on fire.

If Carlos had a million dollars, he'd pay someone to give that poor armless dude a happy ending.

Carlos got hundreds of complaint calls from Jews saying, "I can't believe you said we like to complain!"

Latino barbecues are magical -- until some dick brings tequila to the party.

Latino housewarming parties are just like white housewarming parties, but the gifts are different.

We went into Iraq, killed Saddam Hussein and gas prices are still this high? This is bullsh*t!

The Tyler Perry Show does not make up for the Tuskegee Experiments.

Keep driving toward East LA. When it smells like chili, you're there.

A Chinese man comes home drunk off his ass and asks his wife for a little 69...

Carlos tells a joke, hears a joke and asks an audience member if the Lakers raped his family.

Before gay marriage hit California, it's not like all the gays went to Kentucky.

A man goes down to Argentina and runs into Adolf Hitler...

Sometimes Carlos just wants to raise his hand and ask if he can have a say in his own show.

Carlos would like to know why every time he goes into a Chinese restaurant, all the cooks are Latino.

Carlos wonders whether he'll be told that someone can't make obscene gestures into the air.

They don't make dwarf coffins. They bury them in kid coffins.

Mimes lean forward for the wind. A real mime would be like, "What the fuck was that? It's not that windy!"

She called him a spook, you laughed! I called him old, you said, "Oh, you can't do that, Carlos!"

If we wanted gas prices to go way down, we'd all have to not drive for one day.

I don't think you really support Hillary Clinton. I think you're just sitting next to a chick.

My wife always asks me, "Do you think you know what funny is?" Yes, I do! I think I'm an expert.

Is that Air Wolf? I thought it was Wonder Woman.

You were born in a wheelchair? That must have been hell for your mom.

Carlos' handyman speaks Spanglish, just like Dora the Explorer.

Carlos didn't make his makeup artist gay, but the audience acts like he pushed him over the gay bridge.