Comedy Central's Jokes.com: Joke of the Day Copyright (c) 1995-2008 Comedy Central. All rights reserved. http://www.jokes.com/?rsspartner=rssCCBot The official Comedy Central feed clinically proven to elicit at least one smirk daily. Head to www.jokes.com for more jokes, stand-up videos, and more! en-us 30 Comedy Central 95 95 http://www.jokes.com/?rsspartner=rssCCBot /images/jokes_vertical/promos/jokes_120x90.jpg <![CDATA[Hunters Must Keep Quiet]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/animals/hunters-must-keep-quiet http://www.jokes.com/funny/animals/hunters-must-keep-quiet 2008-12-01
An hour into the woods, Joe hears Steve screaming behind him. "I thought I told you to be quiet!" says Joe.

"Hey, I kept quiet when the snake bit me," says Steve, "and I was quiet when the fox attacked me. But when the two chipmunks crawled up my pant leg just now, I heard one ask the other, 'Should we eat them now or take them with us?'"]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_animals_large.gif <![CDATA[Barbie]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/barbie http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/barbie 2008-10-30 http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[Yo Mama's So Fat... School Bus]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/yo--mama/yo-mama-s-so-fat----school-bus http://www.jokes.com/funny/yo--mama/yo-mama-s-so-fat----school-bus 2008-10-30 http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_yo_mama_large.gif <![CDATA[Halloween Ha-Ha-Frickin'-Ha]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/halloween-ha-ha-frickin--ha http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/halloween-ha-ha-frickin--ha 2008-10-30 Bone appetit!]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[Halloween Treats for the Dead]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/halloween-treats-for-the-dead http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/halloween-treats-for-the-dead 2008-10-30 Some Booo-T]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[Yo' Mama's Teeth... Candy Corn]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/yo--mama/yo--mama-s-teeth----candy-corn http://www.jokes.com/funny/yo--mama/yo--mama-s-teeth----candy-corn 2008-12-01 http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_yo_mama_large.gif <![CDATA[Dead in His Cornflakes]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/vintage/dead-in-his-cornflakes http://www.jokes.com/funny/vintage/dead-in-his-cornflakes 2008-12-01
A: The police thought it was a cereal killer.]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_vintage_large.gif <![CDATA[Fish TV]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/fish-tv http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/fish-tv 2008-10-30 Name that Tuna.]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[Whats Orange And Sounds Like A Parrot?]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/whats-orange-and-sounds-like-a-parrot- http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/whats-orange-and-sounds-like-a-parrot- 2008-10-30 A carrot!]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[Dictaphone]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/men-women/dictaphone http://www.jokes.com/funny/men-women/dictaphone 2008-10-30 He replies, "No. Use your finger like everyone else."]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_menwomen_large.gif <![CDATA[Boogie Nights]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/boogie-nights http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/boogie-nights 2008-10-30 The guys' schlongs have sideburns!]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[Dummy e-mail]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/dummy-e-mail http://www.jokes.com/funny/whatever/dummy-e-mail 2008-10-30
You see a bunch of envelopes stuffed into the disk drive.]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_whatever_large.gif <![CDATA[A Special Night in Iowa]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/blue-collar/a-special-night-in-iowa http://www.jokes.com/funny/blue-collar/a-special-night-in-iowa 2008-12-01
A: Prom.]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_blue_collar_large.gif <![CDATA[Jeff Dunham: Becoming a Wal-Mart Greeter]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/jeff-dunham/jeff-dunham--becoming-a-wal-mart-greeter http://www.jokes.com/funny/jeff-dunham/jeff-dunham--becoming-a-wal-mart-greeter 2009-10-19 Jeff Dunham: What would you do?
Walter: I want to be a greeter at Wal-mart.
Jeff Dunham: Wal-mart, huh? What would be your opening line?
Walter: 'Welcome to Wal-mart. Get your s**t and get out. Have a nice day'.]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_jeff_dunham_large.gif <![CDATA[Jeff Dunham: Nicknames in Bed]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/jeff-dunham/jeff-dunham--nicknames-in-bed http://www.jokes.com/funny/jeff-dunham/jeff-dunham--nicknames-in-bed 2009-10-19 Walter: The what??
Jeff Dunham: The Hurricane.
Walter: Oh yeah, I get it. Exciting at first, then it ends in disaster. You know, maybe she should call you FEMA. Slow to respond and not a lot of satisfying results.]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_jeff_dunham_large.gif <![CDATA[Iron Phone]]> http://www.jokes.com/funny/blonde/iron-phone http://www.jokes.com/funny/blonde/iron-phone 2008-10-30 "The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron."

"What about the other one?"

"They called back."]]> http://www.comedycentral.com/comedycentral/sitewide/images/jokes/tags/generic_tag_blonde_large.gif